


pretty boy (that's what you get for falling again)

by MsFluorescent



Category: SixTONES (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Cute, Drinking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Flirting, Fluff, Guilt, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Not, One Shot, Past Character Death, Pining, Romance, Slow Burn, Swearing, at all, guardian angel!hokuto, guardian angel!kouchi, mortal!jesse, mortal!juri, mortal!shintaro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:13:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26242468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsFluorescent/pseuds/MsFluorescent
Summary: "it's the way that he makes you feel, the way that he kisses you, the way that he makes you cry, the way that he's in your mind...it's the way that he makes you fall in love."
Relationships: (past), Jesse Lewis/Matsumura Hokuto, Kyomoto Taiga/Matsumura Hokuto
Comments: 16
Kudos: 16





	pretty boy (that's what you get for falling again)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jc_lewis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jc_lewis/gifts).



> this is for a fic exchange dedicated to jesse's queen~ title, summary, and inspiration from the song _pretty girl_ by sugarcult.

Hokuto taps his fingers on the tablecloth, gnawing on his bottom lip as he scans the menu held in front of his face. Almost nervously, he peeks over the top of it, eyes landing on broad shoulders atop a slightly lanky frame, dark red hair brushing the top of his collar.

The man he's watching ( _protecting_ , _thank you very much_ ) is chatting animatedly with his companion and there's a whole booth between them so Hokuto can't hear what the conversation is about, but he does hear the raucous laugh that erupts from the male at something his friend said.

Hokuto has to bite down hard on his bottom lip to keep the shocked giggles from escaping. The laugh is contagious; loud, guffawing, entirely joyful.

He's never heard a laugh like that. Nobody in the Other Realms ever laughed like that. Of course, that included himself.

The closest to something that bright that he's gotten before this is-

-is nothing. There's nothing for him to remember.

He forces his mind back to the present. Back to Jesse Lewis. His newest assignment.

He hated the word; it made everything sound so professional, too stiff. But he supposes that was all "angels" were, really.

Most humans depicted angels as good, caring, protective, watchful. Demons were their counterparts, everything they were not.

What humans didn't realize is that what they thought of as "angels" and "demons", were one and the same. In the Other Realms, the Seraphim were above all, second only to the Supreme themselves, whether they guarded the Firmament above or the Nether below.

Seraphim were cold, calculative, greedy. Drunk on the power of being the most powerful reckoning force of the Supreme, they reigned the Realms, clashing with each other and terrorizing the other Beings. 

Hokuto is always glad he had decided to become a guardian; his duties kept him away from the Other Realms as much as possible.

He believes the people on planet Earth describe the feeling perfectly: _fuck that shit_.

His attention snaps back to Jesse just in time to see him and his friend, Tanaka Juri, walk out.

Hokuto curses in the Ancient Language. He's off his game.

He's sure there'd be hell to pay if the others saw how he was acting. He got enamored too easily, they said; affection made Seraphim weak, attachment killed them.

_That's the whole reason he_ -

Hokuto doesn't let the thought finish, shakes his head to shut it up, releasing an annoyed huff.

He didn't have the time to waste on thinking about useless shit right now; all that mattered in this moment was the man he had been tasked to protect. He wouldn't fail.

_Not again._

Hokuto trails Jesse to his apartment, conceals himself behind a newspaper as he watches the man disappear inside.

He wastes no time in reverting to his Seraphic self.

Seraphim had the power of will; the stronger their mind, the more they could do with it. If one was able to do anything simply with their mind, physical bodies would prove to be useless.

All the Seraphim in the Other Realms looked the same: a perfectly symmetrical face, a wispy body of mist, and wide, filmy wings to aid them in faster flying. Their only defining physical attribute was the symbol floating at the core of their diaphanous bodies; the only way to distinguish one Seraphim from the next.

They were all different in personality as well, but they still all shared a cunning, dare he say _conniving_ attribute, not to mention an ego as huge as the Realms were wide.

(And that was saying something, considering the Realms were eternally expanding.)

He slips into Jesse's room, perching himself on his tall dresser, surveying the space. He isn't left to his own devices for much longer before the bedroom's occupant walks in, instantly stripping down to his boxers and plopping into bed.

Hokuto watches him in interest, eyes trailing down the tall torso, the muscles defined just enough to stand out against his lean frame, the soft abdomen, the _long_ legs.

As Jesse drifts off to sleep, the slow rise and fall of his chest and the sprawled sleeping position bring a smile to Hokuto's impeccable face; a warmth settles itself snugly around his core.

Then, the man in front of him is replaced with a shorter, slighter frame, porcelain skin, perfectly plump lips, pretty, light brown hair, and Hokuto chokes.

He blinks and thankfully, the illusion disappears, but its brief appearance leaves him rattled. His ethereal form doesn't comprehend physical sensation ㅡ Seraphim were "beyond" that ㅡ but his mind feels like it wants to cave in on itself.

He thrusts the image deep, _deep_ down into his mind. He'd probably never be ready to face it, and that was fine.

He never wanted to.

Seraphim didn't need to sleep, which means Hokuto is left to do all of nothing while Jesse slumbers, so he drifts down from the dresser and floats ambly around the room. He eyes all the things Jesse has that hint to his personality, lingering on the pictures of him with his family, his two best friends.

Finally, he turns to the man himself. Hokuto hovers over him, tracing the prominent nose, full lips, the crescent shaped eyes that flutter ever so gently as he sleeps.

He sits there for the rest of the night, gazing at a face more beautiful than the harsh perfection of all the Seraphim, all the while trying to ignore the pang of something he knows, but doesn't want to name, piercing through his mind.

* * *

Hokuto peers unsurely up at Club Midnight, taking in everything from the line of people, the immovable bouncers, the loud music and rowdy conversations.

He didn't quite understand what was so appealing about this place, why Jesse and his friends wanted to go here, but at the same time, he didn't quite hate it. It was uproarious, high tension, but not unpleasant.

The Seraphim had always held a weird belief about the recreational activities humans participated in. They liked the idea of clubbing, of alcohol and sex, but at the same time, they also thought themselves above that. If they ever imitated human practices, they'd deny it vehemently.

Hokuto thinks there's a purity to simply letting loose and enjoying oneself without regard for appearances. Even these crowded areas with sweaty bodies invading personal space sounded leagues more enjoyable than the rigidity of the Seraphic attempt at "fun".

He stands in the line to get in, a few people behind Jesse, Juri, and their other friend, Morimoto Shintaro. The latter seems familiar; he's heard the name before, but can't quite place _where_.

**Enraptured already?**

He jerks his head up, startled to hear what he understands as the Ancient Language. In his preoccupation with the three mortals, he had completely missed the radiance of a Seraphim standing right next to him.

A hooded figure turns toward him and Hokuto instantly recognizes the distinct energy, even if the physical appearance is a stranger. **Kouchi. Why're you here?**

The other Seraphim flashes him a beam. The human mask he had chosen has a beautiful smile, one that reaches his eyes. **Same reason you are.**

**For who?** Hokuto tilts his head, hair falling over one eye.

**Morimoto Shintaro.**

Hokuto nods in acknowledgement. **No wonder I thought his name had sounded familiar.** They continue to talk as the line moves, both keeping a protective eye on the three in front of them.

Kouchi was one of the few others who also disliked the atmosphere the Seraphim made in the Realms. 

He was a lot more calculative and logical than Hokuto, no doubt due to the fact that he was Hokuto's senior by a few decades, but he was never egotistical. He treated every being with kindness and as such, was well-known and loved by the rest of the other Beings in a way no other Seraphim was.

He, too, was rejected by most of the other Seraphim, but Kouchi never cared. He always said he found it more fulfilling hanging out with any other Being, even humans.

He liked Hokuto, though. Which was just as well because to him, Kouchi was his one and only friend.

They make it inside and sit themselves at the bar in a position where they can clearly see the men they're supposed to protect.

In order to blend in, they order drinks ㅡ whiskey on the rocks for Kouchi and a long island iced tea for Hokuto ㅡ which they nurse for some time before even attempting to drink.

**That Juri kid. Do you know who's assigned to him?** Hokuto takes a tentative sip of his drink, trying not to let his face scrunch up at the sharp taste of liquor.

**Mm. I think it's Endor.** Kouchi's poker face when he takes a sip of his drink is a lot better than Hokuto's.

Hokuto's face scrunches in disgust again, this time not because of the intoxicant. **Looks like you and I have one more to watch over.**

Kouchi's mouth turns up in a grin. **Ain't that right.**

Hokuto takes another sip of his drink, wiggling a little at the weird warmth that flows down his chest. When in human form, Seraphim could experience everything a human could experience, and Hokuto had never drank alcohol before.

It was weird. He didn't love it, but he also couldn't stop drinking, even if they were minuscule sips every time.

He and Kouchi sit in silence for all of a few minutes before they're interrupted. "Hey! We couldn't help but notice you guys all by yourselves! Wanna join us?"

Well. He'd be damned. He didn't think they'd actually be spotted.

Jesse stands next to Hokuto; Juri and Shintaro flank Kouchi. Hokuto's so taken aback he can't say much. Thankfully, Kouchi's a lot quicker on his feet.

"Oh sure, thank you! I'm Yugo Kouchi," He sends them a bright smile. "and this is my cousin, Matsumura Hokuto. It's his first time in Tokyo!" Kouchi gestures to Hokuto who smiles a small, shy smile. _Cousin?_

"Nice! I'm Jesse Lewis, and that's Morimoto Shintaro and Tanaka Juri. Where'd you come from?" Jesse is leaning on the bar counter, gazing at him. Hokuto's heart rate quickens. "Fukuoka." He picks a city name he can remember off the top of his head.

"Huh. Shame someone as pretty as you's been hidden away in Fukuoka for so long." Jesse flashes him a smile and a wink, and Hokuto can feel his heart in his ears.

How was he supposed to respond to that?

"O-oh. Uh… thanks." _Nice. That was smooth_.

He chances a glance at Kouchi who hides a smile. Juri and Shintaro are grinning, too, but it's aimed at Jesse.

"C'mon! Join us at our booth!" As if he couldn't get any more embarrassed, Jesse drapes an arm around him then, gently pulling him.

Hokuto doesn't know what to do with himself; physical touch isn't something Seraphim did, so being pressed close to someone like this is completely unexpected, but surprisingly, not unwanted.

"You guys wanna take a shot with us?" Juri asks before they've even properly sat down. Kouchi smiles. "Sure!"

"Awesome. I'll grab five!"

"I'll help you."

Before Hokuto can mention that he still has his drink, Juri and Kouchi take off back towards the bar again. Shintaro excuses himself to run to the restroom, and Hokuto stiffens ever so slightly when he realizes he's left alone with Jesse.

"How come you've never been to Tokyo?"

_It's not 'never', is it?_

He ignores the thought. "My family was just... never able to." A good answer. Vague. Not necessarily a lie.

Jesse nods understandingly, doesn't press. "How's it, now that you've been here?"

"It's… colorful. Bright. Lots of people."

Jesse's laugh pearls in the air, and Hokuto has to remind himself not to stare. "Are those good or bad things?"

Hokuto shrugs, letting another small smile slip. "They're not awful."

"You gotta go on a tour with me. I'll help you fall in love with Tokyo."

_Sure. "Tokyo"._

Hokuto still pays it no heed. Nods a little hesitantly, trying to refocus on the man talking to him. "I'd like that."

The smile sent his way makes his chest feel awfully tight.

* * *

Hokuto wakes up with a groan, clutching his head. The light streaming in from the window is too bright; the sounds of the city bustle outside are too loud; the colors that blur in his vision hurt. He can't remember if he's eaten, but he feels like he's going to throw up regardless.

"Here. Water and aspirin." If his head wasn't pounding so hard, it would've shot up in surprise. He knows that voice. As it stands, however, he can only take the items offered and pop the little pill into his mouth, drowning it with water.

"First hangover?" Jesse sounds sympathetic, carefully taking a seat next to him, the bed depressing gently under his weight.

It hurts too much to nod, so Hokuto settles for an affirmative hum. Jesse stays silent, seeming to understand exactly how he's feeling, giving him time to adjust to the nauseating pain.

Eventually, the headache lessens to a dull throbbing. "How- did I get… here?" He looks down at his body; he's still clothed in his outfit from last night.

"Your cousin went home with Juri and Shin and I forgot to get your address from him, so I just took you to my place. Sorry." Jesse sounds apologetic, and Hokuto doesn't quite understand why.

"No, uh, thank- thank you. Did I… do anything, um, weird?" He knows about alcohol and its properties, just not enough to _not_ get wasted, apparently.

God, he really _was_ off his game.

"Nah. You're the quietest drunk I've ever met." A laugh bubbles out of Jesse and this time, Hokuto does look up. "My rambling must've bored you, because you just knocked out." He doesn't sound particularly down about it though, flashing an amused grin towards Hokuto.

Despite himself, a smile makes its way onto his face. "Sorry about that. I've… never gotten that drunk before."

"Don't worry about it! We've all been there." Jesse reassures him with a gentle hand on his shoulder.

The gesture is friendly and makes Hokuto smile, even if his head protests the action.

"I can't cook much but I made some omelettes. You hungry?" Jesse stands up and looks at him. Hokuto doesn't actually know the answer to that, but his body seems to. An audible grumble comes from his stomach.

Jesse grins widely. "Say no more."

The omelette is the most delicious thing Hokuto's ever tasted.

* * *

On Sunday, Hokuto waits for Jesse at the bottom of Tokyo Tower. He fiddles with the cuffs of the oversized suit jacket that hung over the flowy pants he wore and sat on top of a white v-neck shirt.

Kouchi had helped him pick an outfit, considering everything Hokuto wanted to wear was black and unassuming.

**_You can't wear that to a date!_ ** _Kouchi had said when Hokuto had held up a plain black polo._

**_It's not a date._** _Hokuto had grumbled, even as he put his selection away._

**_Whatever. You still can't wear it._** Kouchi sure was particular about the weirdest things.

"Hokuto! Sorry I'm late!" Jesse waves as he runs up. Hokuto pushes off of the leg of the tower he had been leaning on to meet him halfway. "Don't worry, I haven't been waiting long."

Jesse peers at him; for what, he's not sure, maybe to tell if he's lying? He doesn't seem to find whatever he's looking for, because he straightens after a beat, easily slipping an arm around Hokuto. "Alright then, cool."

"Where, um, where are we going?" Jesse _tsk_ s at the question. "Don't you worry your pretty lil' head. I've got the _best_ tour planned!"

Nobody had ever tried to plan anything for Hokuto before, so he nods, smiling softly. "Okay."

True to his word, Jesse's tour is extensive. He shows Hokuto all the main parts of Tokyo, animatedly describing everything in great detail. He talks, Hokuto listens.

And he wouldn't have it any other way.

They wind up at a ramen stand in the evening, ordering some beers and sake so Jesse can show him how to have his first sake bomb.

Hokuto makes sure to slow his consumption of alcohol down this time, the possible consequence of another hangover encroaching on his mind.

Jesse continues to regale stories, telling of his job, what he's doing in school, what he and his friends do for fun. He cracks countless jokes, his demeanor so jolly it seeps into Hokuto.

He finds himself laughing more than he _ever_ has; the feeling is a little strange, but he doesn't mind in the slightest.

They order one more beer each to finish their ramen with, and then once they're sated and a little tipsy, begin the leisurely walk back to Jesse's apartment.

"Ooh hey, come in here! Do you have anything planned for tomorrow?" Jesse pulls him into a convenience store as Hokuto shakes his head. 

"Perfect. We'll grab more to drink and stuff to munch on. You like movies?" Hokuto can't say he's never watched one, so he just says yes.

The walk to Jesse's apartment is full of Jesse asking him about his home life and Hokuto effortlessly lying to him, spinning a tale of a life that doesn't exist.

(Although, maybe it's not as effortless as he thinks, considering the place over his heart seems to hurt as he does.)

They get inside and Jesse blessedly stops asking questions, setting out on looking through the streaming sites he has for something to watch. Hokuto denies knowing most of the movies when asked, but he does slip in some untruthful admissions to keep it convincing.

Jesse picks something that Hokuto doesn't catch the title of, but he doesn't really mind. Not when Jesse is turning to him, handing him a can of beer with a smile.

They don't pay much attention to the movie, end up talking through most of it. At one point, they fall silent, but Hokuto continues to look at Jesse out of the corner of his eye. Traces the features of his face again, like he hasn't been doing it every night since he had first been assigned.

He's definitely drunk, but this time he's aware of it. The world is hazy at the edges, it wobbles uneasily if he moves his head too quickly, and he feels an odd bravery surge through his being, like he could say and do anything he wanted; like the world was his.

He doesn't, though. Doesn't know what he'd say, in any case.

It's Jesse who breaks the silence. "You're real pretty. Do people tell you that?" Hokuto turns to him in surprise, but Jesse doesn't meet his eyes. "U-um. No, they don't. You're the first one."

Hokuto should really not like telling Jesse the truth as much as he does.

Jesse turns to him then, and it's his turn to look surprised. "Either you're just being humble, or all the people in your life are crazy. I mean, how do people look at you," he gestures to Hokuto with a wave of his hand. "and not think you're the damn prettiest thing they've ever seen?"

Hokuto's cheeks feel like someone had set them on fire. Nobody in the Realms did compliments. Every Being knew perfectly well how amazing they were without the need for affirmation.

In all of his years residing in the Other Realms, he had never felt so on top of the world than this moment.

"Th-thank you." He looks down at his lap, then back up, and his heart nearly jumps out of his throat when he sees that Jesse's moved closer to him.

The other male is staring at him with an intensity he can't decipher, and a hand comes up to lightly caress Hokuto's face. "Hit me if you don't want this."

Before the words "Want what?" can even roll off his tongue, Jesse is placing his lips on Hokuto's.

For a second or two, the Seraphim is frozen.

This is… a kiss. The sensation is entirely new, even if the information isn't. Sparks of electricity run up and down his spine. Jesse's lips are softer than pillows, his kiss sweeter than marshmallows. He can't keep himself from scooching closer to the other man, deepening their kiss despite the fact he doesn't even really know what to do.

When Jesse pushes him back against the couch, Hokuto goes willingly. When he begins to undo the clothes Hokuto's wearing, the Seraphim lets him.

Defiled and dirtied by a mortal. That's what the others would consider it.

Hokuto thinks otherwise.

The feeling is soft and pure. Jesse's touch lights him up in the best way. A rapturous heat settles in his abdomen. His skin feels receptive to every fingertip that drags against him.

Even the part of his mind that prods him with his past is no match for this feeling.

They end up on Jesse's bed, lips parting only if they absolutely needed to. At some point, they both end up naked, but Hokuto can't bring himself to feel shy or embarrassed because the way Jesse's eyes run up and down his body makes him shiver.

They spend the night exploring each other, murmuring sweet nothings against the other's skin, pressing open-mouthed kisses to every expanse of skin they can reach.

The sex is like nothing Hokuto's ever experienced, or even thought about, before. Intense pleasure rips through every fiber of his being; ecstasy twists in his veins, twirls around his core. A voice he can't recognize as his own gasps Jesse's name on a repeat. When he climaxes, he's bombarded with a delectation so strong, he blacks out.

When he comes to, he's cleaned and settled snugly in Jesse's arms, head swimming pleasantly with the afterglow.

"That was… amazing," Hokuto says quietly after a while. Jesse presses a kiss to the top of his head. "I'm glad that makes two of us."

They fall asleep soon enough, nestled in the comfort of each other, and Hokuto doesn't even realize that this entire day, he's thought of nothing else other than the man next to him.

_Hokuto's first assignment._

_Slim, pale, the prettiest person he'd ever seen. He was soft-spoken and strong-willed. He walked around with the weight of the world on his shoulders and yet, could smile at anyone with a smile that rivaled the brightest star in the Realms. He was fire and ice; burning ambition behind a cool countenance._

_He was gorgeous. Ethereal, even. Hokuto was a Seraphim and still he thought none of them could hold a candle to the beauty of Kyomoto Taiga._

_Hokuto didn't take a human form, but even then, watching distantly, unseen, Hokuto couldn't help but fall in love._

_He vowed he would protect Taiga, no matter what it took. He was meant to; this was the very reason he had become a guardian._

_Then, when one February rolled around, Taiga and his friends were talking about Valentine's Day. Hokuto had listened just as intently, intrigued by the idea of this holiday._

_Taiga had said he didn't want anything, and realistically, there wasn't anything Hokuto could get him, but he still wanted to try._

_He had been even more naive then._

_Hokuto had been so busy trying to figure out how he could possibly get away with leaving flowers or chocolates in Taiga's bag, that he didn't see his attempt to cross the street._

_He didn't see the barreling car, only heard the awful screech of tires and the screams of the people around him._

_By the time the ambulance had arrived, they pronounced that the boy Kyomoto Taiga was no more._

_Hokuto had failed._

He jolts awake and shoots up. Sobs wrack his body, tears stream down in a never-ending waterfall of pain. He bites his lip and tries to take breaths without them shaking; it doesn't work all that well.

He's never felt human tears before ㅡ Seraphim tears were misty, almost invisible ㅡ but the pain is achingly familiar.

"Hokuto? Hey, hey, c'mere." The sleep thickly wrapped around Jesse's voice makes way for worry when he hears Hokuto crying. Jesse wraps his arms firmly around him, and Hokuto leans into the hug, burying his face in Jesse's chest.

Jesse doesn't pry, doesn't tell him to suck it up. He rubs Hokuto's back and peppers kisses to his head, whispers "It's okay, you can cry" as many times as it takes.

It wasn't that Seraphim were incapable of emotion; they just thought themselves above emotional responses because that was a "human thing to do" and therefore, suppressed them.

Even if Hokuto had seen a reason to, there was no way he could actually do it. He hid it though, as best as he possibly could. The ridicule was enough without the others, god forbid, seeing him _cry_.

So as he cries in Jesse's arms, part of him screams at him to stop, berating him for being weak and showing that weakness.

But because Jesse is letting him, giving him the means to cry without question or judgment, Hokuto rejects that part of him. For now, he was going to let himself be, not weak, but vulnerable.

Seraphim weren't infallible, no matter how much they wanted to believe they were.

* * *

Hokuto didn't believe in running away from an issue. In the Other Realms, you _had_ to stand your ground and face things head on, otherwise every other Being could walk all over you.

So, he talked.

The story Hokuto gave Jesse of his past love was obviously altered, but the feelings and the hurt were all real.

He told of falling in love, of wanting to be with someone and make them happy so badly, that he had forgotten to take care of the person themselves. He told of his guilt, the creeping darkness of it that ate at his soul every day since then.

Jesse held him and listened. He helped Hokuto remember the best times, and not just dwell on the pain; get over his guilt, and come to terms with his grief. To accept it and let himself truly _feel_ it, but also to learn from it.

Hokuto had a long way to go, and he would never, _ever_ forget Taiga, but he feels lighter than he has in a long time.

As for the budding connection between him and Jesse, what happened that night happened again more than once. Around the third time they slept together, Jesse finally ventures, "What does this make us?"

He's lazily tracing patterns into Hokuto's skin and the Seraphim closes his eyes in contentment, even as his brows knit in confusion. "Hm?"

"Y'know. Us. This. Like, are we dating? Do you even want to date?"

Hokuto has to think about his answer. Dating. Another completely human concept. What would it entail? What did it even mean to date? He'd seen couples before, but he still didn't understand what they _did_. What kind of couple would he and Jesse be?

It's in the midst of pondering this, that Hokuto gets hit with a more urgent question.

_How would they even date?_

He was a Seraphim. Jesse was a mortal. Seraphim lived much, _much_ longer lives than humans; the lives of sublime Beings were nowhere near as finite.

Jesse would grow old and die, and Hokuto would still only be a couple of decades older than he already was.

The realization makes him feel like someone's got a rock attached to a rope tied around his heart and it was sinking, anchoring him to the bottom of a pit of despair, drowning him in the unforgiving waters of hopelessness.

He hasn't even realized tears have started falling until Jesse suddenly calls his name in alarm. "Hokuto? What's wrong? Why're you crying?"

Hokuto isn't sure what to say; certainly not the truth, but definitely not a lie. "I- I'm just… I like you. I do. But… I don't- I don't know… I don't know if I'm ready. I don't wanna hurt you, but I also don't want you to think I don't like you-"

"Hey, shhh, don't worry about it." Jesse wraps him up tighter. "Take your time. Figure it out. I'll be here."

Hokuto's tears flow even more freely at such an open display of understanding. "Can- _hic_ -can we still…" Hokuto pauses, unsure of what to say.

Jesse seems to have an idea, and pulls back slightly to give him a smile. "Of course we can. I like you a lot and I'm not giving up that easily. I'll meet you wherever you're at."

Through the tears streaming down his face, Hokuto attempts a smile. "Okay."

A pause.

"Thank you."

"I'll wait for you forever if that's what it takes, Matsumura Hokuto."

Hokuto doesn't think Jesse knows what forever really holds ㅡ hell, neither does he ㅡ but he allows himself to believe in the words nonetheless.

* * *

**You want to** **_what_** **?!**

A booming chorus of a legion of voices thunders across the Realms, and an audible hush seems to fall over everything.

Hokuto flinches, but stays his ground. The Supreme, a shapeless form, void of all that made something full of life, tower over him. The highest ranking Seraphim flanked them, all looking at Hokuto.

Kouchi hovers a little ways behind him for moral support, for which Hokuto is immensely grateful. This would be a hell of a lot harder if he had been all alone.

**You mean to tell us, you want to leave the Realms, give up your Being as a Seraphim, and become a** **_mortal_** **? Not to mention, a _h_** ** _uman_** **? To grow old, and die?**

The Seraphim directly subservient to the Supreme begin to murmur amongst themselves, and Hokuto thinks he hears a few laughs and quite a few scoffs.

He doesn't care. Not anymore. **Yes.**

There is instant silence at the lack of Hokuto's hesitation. Then, **Why?**

Hokuto has agonized over this inevitable question, has torn his (human) hair out at what he would say in response. Even in requesting for and being granted audience with the Supreme, he had had no clue what his response would be.

When finally confronted with it, however, Hokuto realizes it's not that difficult of a question after all. There is something that blazes within him, stronger than the thought of ridicule, more powerful than the idea of losing this empyreal existence.

**Love.**

He definitely heard laughs this time. The Supreme are utterly taken aback, if they hadn't already been. **You are willing to give all** **_this_ ** **up, for… love. The mortal emotion?**

**The very same.** Hokuto prides himself in the fact that his voice doesn't tremble, doesn't waver. Kouchi's presence moves closer and when Hokuto looks, his friend is smiling at him. It isn't one of pity, nor is it a mocking sneer. It's a small smile that Hokuto can feel radiates pride.

He hadn't been planning on giving this up regardless, but Kouchi's support infuses Hokuto with new vigor, a renewed determination.

**You know what stripping you of your Being entails, do you not?**

They'd been warned. **I do.**

**And you are aware of its permanence?**

**I am.**

**Still, you wish to go through with it?**

Hokuto doesn't let even a moment's pause hang in the air. **Yes.**

**Very well.** At this point, the Supreme must want this conversation over as much as Hokuto does. **Farewell, 10618995, Seraphim Hokuto. We will see if you survive the Fall.**

Before those words can even fully register, a pain so crippling washes over him; so intense he can't even scream. Nor does he register the fact that he's free-falling through the Heavens, writhing in the air.

The decades he's lived through thus far as a Seraphim flash through his mind, zoom across his memory as though on its way out.

He doesn't have a sense of identity, whether it be as a Seraphim, or a human, or otherwise. He is nothing, exists as no one, if he even existed at all. If all he was, was a ball of agony, he wouldn't know.

And then, it lifts.

The pain stops and he's surrounded by a cocoon of warmth, caressing his formed human body, his soul, his mind.

The state of depersonalization ceases to be, and he remembers. He was Hokuto the Seraphim, now he is Matsumura Hokuto, the human. 

Once supernal, now a mortal.

The free fall slows until he's descending in a peaceful glide. Only then, can he take in his current situation.

The pearly clouds in the bright, azure sky float languidly around him. He hovers in what looks to be a ball of light, drifting leisurely.

_How was he-_

**I'm glad you're not dead.** A voice he doesn't understand speaks near him and he turns in the direction it came from. He isn't at all startled to see Kouchi there, but he is a little put off to find he can't understand what the Seraphim had said.

"Sorry Kouchi, I didn't get that."

"Oh, right. It would make sense you'd lose the knowledge of the Ancient Language."

"Um, not- not that I'm not grateful, but why'd you save me?" _You didn't have to_.

Kochi's angelic countenance flickers, and then Hokuto can see the face of his human mask, a big smile on it. "You don't deserve to die when all you did was want to live. I love love, and I want you to have yours."

Hokuto returns the smile, a joyous glow spreading over his entire being. "Thank you. What about you? Can we still be friends?"

"Who's gonna stop us?" Kouchi grins.

Hokuto chimes a laugh. "You're right."

"Maybe one day I'll even join you."

"I'll be waiting in case you do."

When they're close enough to the ground, Kouchi releases his protection and Hokuto lands lightly on his feet. He's glad for the practice he's had on human legs thus far because he hadn't quite realized just how disorienting it is to be able to fly, and then… not.

Hokuto knows exactly where he's going to head to, but he hesitates, turning again to Kouchi. His friend shifts to become entirely human, holding his arms out. Hokuto takes the invitation, flying into Kouchi's embrace, wrapping his own arms around in reciprocation.

"Go get him. I'll be watching over both of you." With a final kiss to his forehead, Kouchi once again resumes his celestial form and disappears into the heavens.

Hokuto sends him one last thought of gratitude before he turns, running toward the future he'd been allowed to have. He would always be grateful to his sole friend, for as long as his life had left.

* * *

Hokuto shifts nervously on his feet in front of the apartment door. When he had gathered up the courage to knock, he had heard "Give me a minute!", and now, he just waited in breathless anticipation.

The lock clicks and the door swings open, revealing Jesse in a plain white t-shirt and jeans, a grin coming to his face when he sees Hokuto there. "Hey, you. What brings you here?"

Hokuto answers him by surging forward and slotting their lips, grabbing Jesse around the waist. When they pull away, Jesse leans his forehead against Hokuto's, another smile on his face, a soft blush blooming on his cheeks. "That's one way to answer."

Hokuto smiles back. "I love you." _That_ surprises Jesse. "Whoa, _I_ haven't even used the L-word yet."

"Well then, what the hell are you waiting for?"

It's his first time hearing Hokuto curse and a chuckle bursts out of him. "I love you, too."

"Good. Otherwise, I died for nothing."

Hokuto kisses Jesse again so the other can't question what he said beyond a giggled, "What?"

"Shut up and kiss me back, Jesse Lewis."

"Whatever you say, Matsumura Hokuto."

* * *

**_epilogue_ **

He does end up telling Jesse about his being a Seraphim, and whether it's because the other is an incredibly open-minded person, or he just likes Hokuto a lot, he accepts it easily.

As he wraps Hokuto in his arms after the confession, he presses a kiss to his boyfriend's temple. "I'm glad you became a human."

Hokuto smiles, turning to kiss him on the lips. "Me too."

A contemplative hum and another kiss. Then, "I wanna meet Kouchi."

"I want you to meet him, too. You'd like him."

"Beyond a shadow of a doubt. Besides, for helping you and being by your side, I already do."

Hokuto laughs and it's a pretty sound, like the most beautiful music Jesse's ever heard. With a beam that rivals the Sun, Hokuto takes his breath away. "I bet he's happy to hear that."

**Author's Note:**

> was that cheesy as fuck? Yes.  
> Am I sorry about it? Nope.  
> Tooth-rotting fluff is my mf element.
> 
> It was supposed to be a lot angstier than I made it, so I'm sorry about that.
> 
> Also I didn't want to kill off Taiga, it just fit with the fic. I'm sorry bby


End file.
